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  • Writer's pictureGlow

Flirt and Don't Reverse

Let me paint you a picture: It's Friday night and you're dragging your friends to a bar because you know you've been working too hard on your midterms, and a little free time might do you some good. As the bar gets louder and louder you count your friends' drinks because that's all you can do at this point. No one can hear you. This is when you notice someone noticing you, and damn he's cute. Your eyes meet from across the bar, and you throw him your flirty smirk as you turn away. You try to keep your shit together even though you are 98% sure he is going to talk to you (what can I say, you're a confident woman). He's totally checking you out. Finally, he's walking your way, and then as your turn towards him, he just keeps walking. He walks right out the door without even throwing you a glance.

I know you wanted this story to end differently, but this time it didn't. It's fine though because I'm used to it. See, based on my experience I don't know when people flirt, because flirting gets diluted in the puddle of bullshit that people say to me on a daily basis. Flirting hides behind the pitty that strangers have towards me. Flirting is shackled by the sheer curiosity that lives within society when it comes to women with physical disabilities. In other words, a guy at a cafe asking too many questions about me is usually just that. Yet another dumb fuck.

I know what you're thinking: "you should initiate, flirt first, get it girl", all that shit. Well, that's easier said than done. Why? Becuase they probably don't see me that way (if you have any doubts check out my sexuality post). Thus, all of the cheeky things I say are going to fly right over him. This is why women with physical disabilities tend to be more direct when flirting. Trust me, it works. I'm not advising you to be vulgar just you know, say what's on your mind. Don't get me wrong I'm no expert, at all, but I've recently figured out that if it's not going to work out it's best to know as soon as possible. I have the tendency to be coy sometimes as a defense mechanism for grey areas within a conversation, but that usually comes around and bites me in the ass. Therefore, even though the coy game is very tantalizing and you have convinced yourself that this is the reason for which you play it. I would advise you, Maggie (testing out a name for the 16-year-old girl), that you should accept the fact that you fear rejection because it's only human. The faster you do this, the faster you'll realize that in truth there is nothing more traumatizing than fourteen stitches on an open back wound with no form of anesthetic. In other words, "I only see you as a friend" is a papercut in comparison to what you've been through. So, don't be afraid to draw on that paper, and leave your mark. Make him, or her, remember you as the girl who wasn't afraid to speak her mind.

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